Amagon

Close your eyes for a moment and think of a tropical island. Nice and lush and pretty. Now crash an airplane on it with Andre the Geek, give him a rifle and tell him to spread death, destruction and carnage from one side of the island to the other. As far as I can tell from a half-hearted 15 minutes playing this game, that is the plot. I'd be more hopeful if it involved the two chicks from Gillagians Island jello wrestling, but you take what you can get.
Each and every programmer who sat down to create this game needs to get laid. Badly. So do I for that matter, since I'm the sad fleshbag that's actually sitting down to play this camels hairball of a game.
I'm prepared to let go of the fact that the bees shoot fireballs. I'm willing to let go of the fact that Sum Gie can jump six times his own height (maybe he should be recruited for that All-American Basketball game). What I'm not prepared to let go of is that, despite the complete lack of realism, which is to be expected, there isn't one single, nubile naked tribal chick. Not a one. With this complete lack of cleavage, Sum Gie has to resort to dancing with the Lion Guy.

Yea, I feel pretty violated too.