Alien Syndrome

Thanks to a bout of the stomach flu, I spent New Years very much like I always have. Spewing various unnatural colours into the toilet. Thanks to that stomach flu, I didn't get the chance to do all the drinking that normally precedes that, much to my regret. If I'm going to be puking, I want to make sure I've got the inebriation to go with it. So it's with that same taste of bile still lingering in the back of my throat that I present you with Alien Syndrome. I'm far too lazy to bother to do an animation for this, so trust me, the little tail moves, ah-la-neon sign in the Amsterdam red light district, just without the tits. I'm still trying to figure out why the Japanese seem to think that men and women have exactly the same facial structure, just different hair. Of course, I'm still trying to figure out the Japanese, so that comes as no real surprise. The instructions are clear and precise, helpful for the 8 year old brain-dead audience that this game was aimed at. Thankfully, I can honestly say that I never have dreams where this happens. I am never assaulted by giant pink nipples that explode when you shoot them. I think the last straw was when I found myself fighting a head sticking out of an alien birth canal. That's just wrong. On so many levels.