Armadillo
Take a moment to think of what it must be like to live in the head of Keith Richards. Now take that image and hold onto that in your head while you first drop a cubic metric fuckton of acid, and then watch Richard Simmons anally violate Saddam Hussein while dressed in a Michael Jackson outfit. Then you might have a small idea of exactly how bizarre and surreal this game really is.
Alternatively, you can listen to any Mr. Bungle song ever recorded and get the exact same experience. On a related side note, Mike Patton plays this game regularly and actually understands it. Too bad nobody, not even God, understands Mike Patton. 
I suppose you could look at it like modern art. The Crow is a symbol of alienation in modern society, as expressed through the music of Pink Floyd, while the rolling green hills bring to light the inner child dying amongst the pressures of a corporate driven lifestyle. The flower, which, if put in perspective would be something like 18 feet high, is an obvious reference to how our perspective is skewed and we don't see things in a realistic fashion. The train -- now the train is obviously a comment as to how much of a train wreck this particular train of thought has become. 
I've developed a new hypothesis about Japanese game designers. Once they're released from the test tube incubation room, they are habitually beaten and given overdoses of hallucinogenic drugs until age 18, at which point they are sent to solitary confinement for a period no less than 6 years. It's only when they see Johnny Cash in every Rorschach Test inkblot that they are allowed into the real word, given a computer, and forced to create games for 18 hours a day. 
This new hypothesis would go far to explain the images that we are seeing here today. Actually it wouldn't, but it's a scenario that I like to think about. 
Please understand, I have nothing against the Japanese. I like the Japanese, as clearly evidenced by my vast collection of Asian porn. 
Games like this, however, make me wonder about a group of people who believe that a bunny flying around on helicopter ears makes for a perfectly reasonable enemy. 
Alternatively, you can listen to any Mr. Bungle song ever recorded and get the exact same experience. On a related side note, Mike Patton plays this game regularly and actually understands it. Too bad nobody, not even God, understands Mike Patton. 
I suppose you could look at it like modern art. The Crow is a symbol of alienation in modern society, as expressed through the music of Pink Floyd, while the rolling green hills bring to light the inner child dying amongst the pressures of a corporate driven lifestyle. The flower, which, if put in perspective would be something like 18 feet high, is an obvious reference to how our perspective is skewed and we don't see things in a realistic fashion. The train -- now the train is obviously a comment as to how much of a train wreck this particular train of thought has become. 
I've developed a new hypothesis about Japanese game designers. Once they're released from the test tube incubation room, they are habitually beaten and given overdoses of hallucinogenic drugs until age 18, at which point they are sent to solitary confinement for a period no less than 6 years. It's only when they see Johnny Cash in every Rorschach Test inkblot that they are allowed into the real word, given a computer, and forced to create games for 18 hours a day. 
This new hypothesis would go far to explain the images that we are seeing here today. Actually it wouldn't, but it's a scenario that I like to think about. 
Please understand, I have nothing against the Japanese. I like the Japanese, as clearly evidenced by my vast collection of Asian porn. 
Games like this, however, make me wonder about a group of people who believe that a bunny flying around on helicopter ears makes for a perfectly reasonable enemy. 
posted by network_failure at 5:51 AM
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