A game-by-game diary of my attempt to play every Nintendo game. From 8-Eyes to Zombie Nation and everything in between. Even that strange Christian game where you convert people by hitting them with fruit. Just wait. You'll see.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Architect
One day James Bond went home after yet another day of saving the world. He sat down and looked at yet another martini, shaken not stirred. He looked at yet another buxom brunette splayed out, naked and waiting. He realized something. He was bored with his life. He needed something. He was bored. He'd done everything.With that terrible realization, he sat down and decided to create the ultimate game. The apex of action, the definition of distraction, the something of something else. The result was "Architect". The small group of people who have experienced "architect" all agree. He failed. Miserably.As a matter of fact, he could have auctioned off a kidney stone and it would have added more to the world than this. Hell, it worked for William Shatner. Basic premise? You build a building using a set of pre-given pieces.End result? A game that's less entertaining than talking to Brittany Spears. Check that. If you're talking to Brittany Spears, then at least you can check out her tits and think of a time when she was still hot. This game is less entertaining than talking to Brittany Spears over the phone while playing solitaire using a desk of 43 cards.
Location: Terminus (Where All Rail Service Ends, Brother), Georgia, United States
I'm 27, a self-made oil, rail and steel tycoon whose combined income makes Bill Gates cry like a little bitch. I look like Johnny Depp, Christian Slater, or Brad Pitt, depending on which chatroom I'm in. I have a 19" prehensile penis that I use to hold my coffee while I type. I know where Jimmy Hoffa lives, and I understand the language of cats. I help old ladies cross the street and translate ethnic slurs for cuban refugees in my spare time. I sleep only one hour a night. I make ice cubes with the power of my mind. I can touch MC Hammer. I know every rivet in the Russian T-34 tank. I've advised Presidents, slept with movie stars, and can organize my sock drawer in less than 23 seconds.
And I still have time to do this blog.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home